Good Morning! Today’s edition is 1,022 words, a 4-minute read.

What’s on tap: 

• $20,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 fine

• Starbucks axes dairy substitution upcharge

• Biden bites babies at White House Halloween event

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Big Story

Fake Teachers in Texas

Five people in Texas face charges for organizing a cheating scheme that falsely certified over 200 teachers.

• Candidates would pay $2,500 to have someone else take certification tests for them at two testing centers in Houston, bribing proctors to allow the switch.

• The operation was led by a boys high school basketball coach named Vincent Grayson and involved more than 400 fraudulent exams since 2020. It generated over $1 million for him.

• The scheme was uncovered in mid-2023 when the Texas Education Agency (TEA) noticed unusual patterns, such as candidates who previously failed the exams passing after traveling to Houston to retest.

• The TEA and Houston Independent School District are investigating the teachers linked to the scheme and vowed to fire anyone who fraudulently obtained their certification.

Big Story

$20,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, 000,000,000,000 Fine

A Russian court ordered Google to pay an astronomical fine of about $20 decillion rubles.

• The Moscow court issued the fine because Google blocked 17 Russian media channels on YouTube that support President Putin and Russia's invasion of Ukraine.

• Google originally banned channels belonging to the now-deceased Wagner Group mercenary chief Yevgeny Prigozhin in 2020 and expanded the ban after Russia’s Ukraine invasion in 2022.

• The court ruled Google must restore the accounts, and the fine for noncompliance will increase daily. The compounding penalty dwarfs Google's total market value ($2tn) and even the size of the global economy ($110tn).

• Kremlin spokesperson Dmitry Peskov said the fine was mainly symbolic but intended to get Google’s attention to unblock Russia’s broadcasts.

Big Story

Young Thug Pleads Guilty

Atlanta rapper Young Thug agreed to plead guilty in Georgia’s longest-running criminal trial.

• Young Thug, legal name Jeffrey Lamar Williams, was indicted in 2022 under Georgia's RICO law and accused of leading the alleged gang Young Slime Life (YSL). YSL’s members have been linked to murder, armed robbery, drug dealing, and carjacking.

• Twenty-seven YSL members were named as co-defendants in the case. Recently, three co-defendants pled guilty, receiving reduced sentences, while one remains in prison for an unrelated life sentence.

• Williams' plea deal is non-negotiated which means the judge will have the final say in sentencing.

• Young Thug gained fame with his song "Stoner" in 2014 and established his record label, YSL Records, in 2016. He’s had three No. 1 Billboard albums and won a Grammy in 2019 for co-writing Childish Gambino’s hit "This Is America."

Quick Stories

U.S. News

• A Virginia jury found former CIA officer Ashkan Bayatpour not guilty of sexual assault charges in a case that changed how the CIA handles sexual assault allegations. Six women and one man were on the jury. (More)

• Philly District Attorney Krasner’s lawsuit to block Elon Musk's $1M giveaway to Pennsylvania voters has stalled. Musk’s lawyers asked to move the case to federal court, which puts it on hold until a judge decides where it belongs. (More)

• The New York Supreme Court charged a woman with a hate crime for pepper-spraying a Muslim Uber driver while he was praying. The man stopped at a red light and began praying; then the woman sprang from the backseat and sprayed him in the face. (More)

World

• Eight Mexican Supreme Court justices said they will leave their positions rather than run for election next June. Mexico’s new judicial overhaul requires justices to be elected rather than appointed by the Senate. (More)

• Typhoon Kong-rey lashed Taiwan on Thursday as the largest storm to hit the island in almost three decades. It killed one person and injured dozens. The storm’s winds reached 125 mph — equivalent to a Category 3 hurricane. (More)

• London Police arrested a suspect in the “grate cheese robbery” case. Fraudsters stole more than 24 tons ($390,000) of artisanal cheese from Neal’s Yard Dairy in London. The suspect made bail, and police are still looking for the cheese. (More)

Business & Economy

• US stock markets closed lower on Thursday (S&P -1.86%, Nasdaq -2.76%, Dow -0.90%). Disappointing quarterly reports from big tech companies drove the markets down. (More)

• Mortgage rates rose for a 5th consecutive week. The average rate of a 30-year fixed mortgage jumped to 6.72%. However, it’s lower than last year’s rate of 7.76% (More)

• Starbucks’s new CEO made a change that will please the dairy-averse. It will stop charging extra for dairy alternatives, saving some customers more than 10% on their drinks. (More)

Sports & Entertainment

• A judge ruled that Sean “Diddy” Combs’ rape accuser must reveal their identity or the case will be thrown out. The woman claims Combs raped her in 2004 when she was 19. (More)

• Comedian Bill Burr will host the first post-election Saturday Night Live on Nov. 9. Guitarist, producer, and vocalist Mk.gee will be the musical guest. (More)

• The Dodgers World Series celebration got a little wild in Los Angeles. Crowds burned a city bus, broke into stores, and lit fireworks. Police arrested 12 but said most fans celebrated peacefully. (More)

Science, Health, & Tech

• Most birds need to eat foods with carotenoids to get their colors. Parrots, however, are different—they make their own pigments called psittacofulvins. Scientists recently discovered that one enzyme (ALDH3A2) helps parrots switch these pigments from red to yellow. (More)

• Scientists unearthed the oldest-known tadpole fossil in Argentina. The frog larva lived with dinosaurs about 161 million years ago during the Jurassic period. (More)

• A USC study found that reducing sugar in babies’ diets during their first 1,000 days can protect them against chronic disease. Following dietary guidelines decreased type 2 diabetes by 35% in middle age and cut high blood pressure by 20%. (More)

Extra Credit

🦇 The Batmobile from the “Dark Knight” trilogy can be yours for $3M.

🧛 Biden bites babies at White House trick-or-treat event.

🧠 The psychology behind a perfect prank.

🗽 Jaywalking is now legal in NYC.